Why am I such a thinker? Why do I over-analyze everything and consider 9 million options in decisions? Why can't I just go with things and make my life a little easier? Is my "deep thinking" really God's gift to me? I'm not so sure.
I was told yesterday that I tend to base my relationship with God on the situations around me. So, if things are good then my relationship with God is good. However, if something rough happens to me or someone I care about, then the questions,the anger, and the frustration at God come roaring back. So, I work hard at making things as smooth as possible so my relationship with God and with others follows suite. The downfall to all of that is pretty rough. It puts me on a never-ending rollercoaster ride with God. Here's the point, when life is good or when it's rough, God is still the same. So how do I get to that point? By slowing my mind and my emotions down to remind myself of the truth that I know about God and the truth in a situation. Once again, the conflict of an over-analyzing mind.
At least I have something to work on and to help me to keep moving toward the house.
So what about all the new things going on? Still thinking about those. Maybe in the next couple of weeks I will have some idea of what to do.
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3 comments:
or not......;) and you'll still keep on moving......
wow I sure can relate so very much to your sharing here laura!! A counselor I had once told me i was the king of all secondguessers he had ever met a very uneasy thing to be So good to read your words always. I am with becky, you will keep journeying forward. God does not change. That ultimately gives me real comfort even as my mind overanalyzes and wants to smooth things out :)
Smitty,
My thoughts (for what they are worth)as believers I don't think we should be smoothing out our relationship with God. If those feelings come back, they are real and I would say wrestle with those thoughts and feelings with God. To me God does not like us to hide what is truly going on inside us.
Modern Christianity or postmodern (i try not to get in to labels) people have messed this concept up. In the Old Testament, story after story people railed against God--David, the prophets, Israel, Job, Moses just to name a few. They didn't always like the answer but they did not go in to spiritual denial of what was going on.
Be real with God and He will be real with you--warning you may be shocked with some of his disclosures.
becky
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