Hum......

Not knowing what to say sucks. I shall see what comes out.

The Thankful list is getting difficult. I do have to be intentional about what I look for each day to be thankful for. In all honesty, it's not easy to be thankful right now. I feel like things just aren't going quite right. I don't know what's going on. Last night we had rehearsal for FX and it completely bombed. It was horrible! However, I know that by Wednesday night, it will all go together. Which I am thankful to God for. I have also been reminded during this week of Operation Christmas Child that there are so many other people in the world that have more significant problems then I do. So, I just need to get over all of this and trust God with it all.

That's what I hear people saying to me and what I am telling myself. This is where the second part of my homework comes in. Each day I have to tell myself to take the small amount of trust I have in God for that day and let that be enough. So, that requires a lot of hard work but I'm going to give it a shot. I'm still not at the porch but maybe this is a step to get there.

I think I need to challenge myself a bit. I don't know what tomorrow has in store but I do know that God is with me and that will have to be enough.

Also, after talking with a good friend on Friday, I was once again reminded that no one is completely going to understand. God is the only one who will completely understand and He wants me to come to Him instead of seeking other people to "get it." They won't...there's no need in spending all my effort in telling them my story in hopes that they understand.

I think there will be some changes coming...I'm not exactly sure what those are, but I just feel like something must change. We shall see.

God is in control, God is in control, God is in control....